Update 14

Note: This update is extremely crucial update as it shows the main aspect of this story. Please note this update in no way encourages you to follow the same. It depicts one side of how one can behave when they are in this situation. Its a work of fiction and no way promotes anything.

(Narrator’s POV)

Naina entered the house and straight away went to her room without noticing vishakha. She was emotionally not stable, she was not in a state to think rationally and hence without acknowledging vishakha’s presence she went into her room. She needed time to get back to normal otherwise she would make more mess than it was already created. Vishakha who was happy to see naina returning, kept looking at the door, she was hoping sameer too would enter and then she would spend sometime with her children.

Ever since the decision was taken to marry sameer with naina, sameer and her hadn’t talked properly. Sameer gave her a cold shoulder, no matter how much she tried to mend their relation, he kept his distance from her. One decision took her son away if possible, than he already was. She thought if she would spend time with them, especially with naina’s presence he would talk with her and that would break the ice that was created between mother and son. But after waiting for five mins when sameer didn’t enter she decided to ask naina about it.

Vishakha moved to naina’s room where she found the room locked. Vishkaha knocked on the door until it was opened by naina.

Naina when she entered her room, straight away went towards the bathroom and tried controlling herself. She was almost having a panic attack.

Naina looked at her crying self in the mirror and said “yeh ansu peecha kyun nahiin chodte hain. Itna toh mien roti hoon phir yeh ansu sukhte kyun nahiin hai kyun behte rehte hain. Tujhe toh pata hai na naina duniya ither ki uther ho sakti hai lekin bhagwan? Vo tujhe rota hua hi dekhna chahte. Ab aap khush hai dekhiye ro rahi hoon mien aap phir jeet gaye. Kitni baar kahu apse miene haar maan li hai please mera peecha chod do I literally beg of you. Aisa lagta hai mien apke liye entertainment hoon jab apko mann hota hai khush hone ka toh mujhe rula dete hain. Ab dekh liya na mujhe rote huye? Ab aur kya bura karne wale hain aap? Mien apse baat hi kyun kar rahi hoon aap sunne thodi wale hain. Nahiin naina mat ro tu unhe khush hone ka mauka nahiin de sakti”.

Naina washed her face and then wiped her face with towel. She went and sat on the bed with eyes closed. After few seconds, she heard a knock on the door. She thought it would be sameer but when she opened the door it was vishakha.

After sometime Sameer too came back. When he was entering his house many thoughts were running in his mind. He was wondering how he would talk to naina in front of vishakha? With his mom in the house if he talked with naina on this topic, he didn’t know what would happen. Would she tell his mom the reality or fight with him in front of his mom? He couldn’t think of anything, he dreaded the situation that would occur. Would she do the same, telling vishakha the truth like he told her friends?

When he entered the house he expected his mother to be standing at the door waiting to scream at him but house was silent. He scanned the hall to see if anyone was coming out of the room or kitchen after feeling his presence. His eyes then fell on a note kept on the table. He picked it up and read it. It was from Vishakha saying due to some emergency she and his father are flying out of the country for two days to attend some business conference. Sameer sighed as vishakha wouldn’t see Naina in this condition neither would she hear their conversation.

FLASHBACK

Sameer was totally confused with Munna and Swati’s talk. He couldn’t understand what they were talking but it certainly made him curious. When he couldn’t take the confusion he thought to ask them.

“Guys will you please tell me what are you guys talking about I really want to know why you are saying Naina is not fine. She doesn’t have fever neither she looks unhealthy I mean she eats her food daily. On what basis are you saying she is not fine please elaborate” Sameer asked.

Swati looked at Munna who blinked his eyes conveying her to tell him.

Swati shocked, she asked munna “sab janne ke baad bhi tum ispe trust karne ko tayar ho kaise or kyun? Hum ispe trust nahiin kar sakte munna”.

Munna sighed and said “Agar yeh bhi yahi sochta ki hume sab bataye ya na bataye toh hume kaise pata chalta ki hamari dost kaisi hai? Hume kaisa jawab milta hamare sawalon ka ki vo humse ab tak kyun nahiin mili ya baat kyun nahiin ki”.

Swati was about to reply to munna but his one look made swati quiet.

Swati sighed and said “we think she is in depression and since Munna is a doctor he can see the symptoms”.

Munna says “Baat symptom ki nahiin hai swati poori baar bolo. Actually humne kuch dekha hai isi liye hume lag raha hai ki vo depression main hai”.

Hearing about depression Sameer was shocked beyond his limits. He was numb for few seconds. Did he heard the right word or his brain was playing some weird games with him? He was staying with her then how come he missed such an important thing? How did he not realized that behind that smiling face there could be sadness also? How did he failed to notice the sadness that she was carrying along with her? How it did not occurred to him even once that there could be a reason why she stayed aloof? How did he missed to notice her pain? How did he not realized that the truth could shatter her? How did he not realized that she must have needed someone to share her pains or sufferings with? Why did he assumed seeing her smiling face that she had taken this truth positively? Was he so much busy in his life that he forgot to notice someone else’s life?

“Depression” Sameer mumbled not knowing whether he was asking them or was trying to grasp the reality. He was totally blank. He had no idea what was he supposed to do now?

“Sameer can we sit and talk please” Munna asked and this brought Sameer back to reality.

He looked at Munna and Swati and found them staring at him with hopeful eyes. He nodded his head in agreement. All three of them sat on the table. He wanted to hear them out, he wanted to know more about naina. He realized that he never initiated the talk with naina.

“Sameer did you ask Naina why there is a cut on her hand” Munna asked.

This drew Sameer’s attention to the incident where he had seen those cuts and had inquired about the same with Naina but she didn’t tell him anything in reply rather she had changed the topic. But why are they asking about that cut?

“Yes, I did noticed that cut in her hand and had even asked her about it. But, she never told me anything she just changed the topic” Sameer said.

Swati sighed and asked her “I expected this reaction from her only. When you told her you love someone else what did she do?”

“Nothing simply went inside the washroom and after sometime she came out and said she would help me in uniting us that’s it” Sameer instantly replied. Sameer tried to remember if there was any sadness on her face when she had said it or did he missed noticing it like always.

He was trying to understand what was making them think that Naina was in depression because he had never felt Naina was in depression. He was trying hard to recall any incident which might give him a hint that Naina was in depression because as far as he had read on internet a person whose in depression never smiled, never laughed and most importantly never behaved normal but Naina was smiling, laughing and above all behaving normally. She was going to office, talking with his mom sometime. Whenever he talked with her she was not avoiding him. If at all he was the reason behind this depression, then she would have avoided talking with him. She was all normal with him.

“She didn’t shout at all” Munna asked bringing Sameer back to reality. Sameer nodded his head in ‘no’ that she didn’t shout at all.

“She didn’t ask you or tell you about joining her office and dance class” Swati asked.

This shocked Sameer as he clearly remembered when they had gone to disco, he had asked her to dance but she said she hated dancing.

“She told me she hates dancing” Sameer said in a confused tone. Now it was Munna and Swati’s turn to get their share of shock.

“She said this? I can’t believe it, she loves dancing sameer. She was an ace dancer of our school and college. She has won so many awards for dancing and before marriage she was taking training in dance. I did go there in a hope to see Naina but came to know she withdrew her name from that class. Then I thought she must have joined the class which would be near her house” swati said.

Before Sameer could react or let the information sink in him Munna asked him “did you take her or ask her to go for a movie”

“She told me she hates watching movie that’s why she was sitting here in the cafe instead of theatre” Sameer said again in a confused tone.

This time Munna and Swati were not shocked as they understood why Naina did this. She didn’t tell Sameer who the real Naina was? She was hiding her real self from Sameer she told Sameer everything opposite about herself. But one thing they couldn’t understand was that why she did this?

“Dude you don’t know how much she loves watching movie” Munna said.

“Yes she hated to go outside much so she used to watch at home and used to call me to watch along with her” swati said.

“Why did she lie to me then” Sameer asked in a confused tone again. He was not understanding anything, everything that Naina told him about her was all wrong? Why did she do this? He thought he was starting to understand her but it seemed like he never knew her at all.

“She didn’t lie she was trying to hide the Naina who everyone knows she was trying to be someone who she can never be” Swati said.

“Matlab” Sameer asked immediately. Suddenly he was now curious to know about naina.

“Matlab ye ki if she would have joined her dance classes back and would have danced or seen a movie she would have felt better and lighter as whenever she is upset she likes to either dance or watch a movie. Since she didn’t do all of this, may be she deliberately didn’t do, it slipped her into depression. She was trying to be someone who she herself doesn’t recognize. Swati I think she was again pushing herself into depression like last time and those cuts are nothing but a proof that she wants to punish herself” Munna said.

Before Swati could say something Sameer asked “punish herself for what?”

“It’s her childhood thing she feels whenever she cries or is happy something bad will happen with her so if she is happy she breaks her favorite thing to remain sad and if she cries she slightly cuts her hand so that blood flows instead of her tears. It was her unusual way of distracting herself from crying. She said, pain of that cut, doesn’t let her cry. Also, It reminds her not to smile/laugh or cry. She thinks it makes her strong in avoiding happiness and tears but she is mad” Swati said.

“After lot of convincing we made her stop doing this and told her not to think like this as its totally absurd. Instead we told her to share her pains and happiness with us as we are there for her. Though she never shared her pain much but she stopped cutting her hand after that. She did punish herself for smiling or crying in some other way which we also don’t know. But, since we were not around her to make her think straight she resorted to the same old method once again” Munna said.

Silence prevailed. Sameer was shocked beyond limits he didn’t know how to react or what to react. All this information about Naina was just too much for him to digest it. He never thought a person whom he saw smiling was actually not smiling but was hiding immense pain behind that smile.

“Swati this is clear indication that she is in pain and depression. Sameer we need your help please bring her here again tomorrow we need to bring her back” Munna said.

“If it’s this critical come home with me talk to her right now” sameer suggested immediately.

“Like we said she is not the naina that we know in your house. We will take her to her favourite place where she is naina, the one we know then we’ll talk with her. Also, a lot happened today we need to cool down ourselves as well before talking with her otherwise things can mess up” swati said.

Sameer looked at Munna and Swati and asked “aren’t you guys angry on me for hurting your friend to such an extent that she is in depression now”

“We are but, it’s someone else who has hurt her more than you have hurt her” Swati said

Sameer asked them instantly “who”

“Naina won’t like we telling you about this and we have already told you more than you should know anyway you go home and bring her here tomorrow we’ll meanwhile develop a strategy to bring the old Naina back” Munna said and Sameer nodded his head in agreement before leaving for home.

FLASHBACK ENDS

Sameer entered his room and saw it was empty he was about to leave when Naina stepped out from the washroom all dressed up. After knowing the truth Sameer can now see the pain in Naina’s eyes. He cursed himself for not seeing it before, her friends just saw her for a moment and they realized she was in pain. How lucky she was to have such wonderful friends. But then he suddenly realized and wanted to know why she stayed away from her friends. A question that was continuously running in his mind ever since he got to know the truth.

Before Sameer could ask anything Naina asked him “kya apke paas abhi time hai? I mean kya aap abhi free hain?”

“Hain lekin kyun” Sameer asked instantly.

“Agar apko koi problem nahiin hai toh kya aap mere saath chalenge please” Naina asked with a hopeful eyes.

“Kaha” Sameer asked.

“Apne aap samaj jayenge” Naina said.

Sameer was confused he thought Naina would shout at him for telling her friends everything but she was behaving totally different. ‘Is this what depression does to a person? Behave opposite of what is expected from you?’ Sameer thought.

Sameer smiled and both of them walked out of the house.